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Sermon 133 – Bi-Polar Narcissism

Recently, I was counselling a young man who was in torment over a corrective comment I made about his inappropriate behaviour. Months later he was still struggling to come to terms with my correction. One minute he was in agreement that he had done something wrong, and the next minute he was struggling to accept that he really had done anything bad. His mind would flip from one decision to the opposite analysis and he would convince himself that I had misunderstood his intentions, or explain that he hadn’t really done it, because it was only in his head so it hadn’t really happened.

My Bible says that if you’ve done it in your heart, then you’ve done it, but narcissism won’t accept that as the truth.

Ignorant Psychological Imbalance

Sadly, most of the Christians I’ve counselled over my 24 years of ministry have consistently displayed the psychological imbalance of bipolar narcissism.

Convinced that they are genuine Christians, they have no understanding whatsoever that their spirits are just white-washed sepulchers. You can talk to them and even convince them that they are mis-evaluating their spirit’s condition, but ultimately, they can’t accept your diagnosis, and therefore, they won’t take the medicine that would convert them.

Narcissism

Narcissism derives it’s meaning from Greek Mythology where a youth fell in love with his own reflection in a pond to such an extent that he pined away and died. Nothing else mattered than to have his self-image honored, and even worshiped and adored. Everything he did was to propagate his own self-image. Thus, he could never love anything. He just used everyone to manipulate them to love him, and he called this, love.

That’s why the Word of God declares in 1 Corinthians 13, that you can give all your money to the poor and even give your body to be burned but it avails nothing if it isn’t done because of your love for Christ. If you do anything to prove that you are good, or right, or loving, then you are doing it for yourself, and that’s narcissism.

Narcissistic Christian

In spiritual terms, a narcissistic Christian is simply someone who worships Jesus for the love of themselves. They believe they are so good that God would love them unreservedly and favour them. Their belief is … I love me so much, I can’t believe that you wouldn’t love me too, so if you challenge my thinking you must be wrong. They’re not a genuine Christian and they’re not saved from hell; they’re just using God to justify their own self-worship, and they’re committed to Jesus and do what He wants as long as it promotes their self-worth.

Diagnosis

The diagnosis of a narcissistic Christian comes at the point of correction. Any suggestion that they made a mistake sets them in a spin. All they want to do is explain their thinking so you will understand why they did it. They’re so wrapped up in what people think of them they have to restore their self-image at any cost. In their heart they know you’re right, but their mind refuses to accept it a true, so they display bi-polar syndrome.

Narcissism is the fruit of no correction, or the fruit of defiance when you are corrected.

Bi-Polar Syndrome

Bi-Polar simply means being in two minds. It’s the modern term for schizophrenia. More than one personality dwelling in the same body. You see, if a person is above correction by explaining it away, then what they’re really saying is … you can’t tell me my own mind. Two personalities are really just the evidence of two spirits operating through you … you and a demon, and sometimes, Holy Spirit. If you can’t bring your mind consistently to faith in Jesus Christ when Satan tempts you with sweet voices like those of the mythological sirens, then Satan has you in his clutches through demonic occupation (2 Timothy 2;26) of your spirit, and you evaluate and analyse under the influence of this demon.

To a narcissist, their mind is correct, but to a righteous shepherd, if a narcissist’s mind can’t be brought to correction, then that person is spiritually bi-polar, like King Saul and the Pharisees.

The … Love doesn’t hurt my feelings Lie

Bi-Polar and Narcissism is really just a modern psychological way of describing “pride”. Nobody likes being told they’re proud, so they cover it with niceness, good works, generosity, skills, friendliness and any means that will hide their true self. A narcissist just can’t handle being told they’re wrong, but the real problem is that they’re just too proud to be told anything negative about themselves because it hurts their feelings and love doesn’t hurt feelings. To their mind, they’re infallible, and infallibility thinking is just  further proof that a narcissist doesn’t really believe that they need God; they can do it all themselves; they can even save themselves. A narcissist believes God needs them. But the cover-up actually blocks their salvation, because Jesus came to save you from your pride, so if you won’t expose it, He can’t save you. If correction doesn’t hurt your feelings, then it’s not correction.

Samson

In Judges 13 to 16, we read the story of a man who was given a powerful gift to use for God, but he decided he was the man and no one was going to tell him what to do, including his parents. God used Him for His purposes up to a point. He was so proud and full of his own self-image that even though he knew that the Philistines were laying in wait for him whilst he was committing fornication, he had full confidence in his self-ability to defeat them. He was totally narcissistic and bi-polar. Two different spirits operated through his body. The only way God could bring him to his senses and to his right mind was for him to lose his power and his eyes. How arrogant and stubborn that one has to lose their eyes before they’ll see.

I’m Special

Sadly, my experience with people is that most believe they are ‘special’ or they think they have an important job to do, when really, all it is that they are too proud to see their stubbornness and arrogant pride. Their parents have told them they are special and they like it; but the truth is, like Cain, Joseph’s brothers, and Esau, they’re just secretly envious of their sibling’s favour. Narcissism is just really someone being full of the hate of someone else being more favoured. Their envy feeds their wounded pride, and like King Saul, most get occupied by demons, but a few like Samson wake up in the face of trauma.

Wanting Nothing

James 1:4 declares that the trials of our faith are for patience so that we learn to trust God by faith and want nothing other than to serve His will. If this isn’t the heart’s true objective then, the consequence is double-mindedness (v.8), or in other words, bi-polar. If you really want something instead of nothing, then you are trying to hide your narcissism and bi-polarity with a lie.

Torment

Once you secretly hide behind niceness, spirits of lying and spirits of fear will torment you. 1 John 4:18 declares … there is no fear in love. Fear has torment. Instead of experiencing the peace of God which passes all understanding, you’ll suffer from the torment of spirits of fear. Instead of owning the truth about your wrong, a narcissist ultimately always comes up with an explanation that justifies their decision, but it’s never the real truth; it’s always a truthful lie. Instead of repenting, you’ll reinforce the occupation of your spirit by lying spirits that will stimulate your fears.

Great peace have they which love My law and nothing shall offend them, Psalm 119:165.  Instead of peace, you’ll be constantly offended at any suggestion that you may have done something wrong or offended at any defamatory comment, and you’ll suffer the torment of your fears, yet in your stubbornness of rightness you’ll explain it away as the corrector’s misunderstanding error.

It’s interesting to note that the Greek word for torment is also translated in Matthew 25:46 as everlasting punishment. When you’re tormented by your fears, God is giving you a taste of what hell feels like in the hope you’ll wake up and see.

Love the World

Why are so many so-called Christians, bipolar. My experience is, they want to serve God, but they also want the world, so, like Samson, they live in two camps, trapped by the fantasies of their narcissism, afraid of persecution, afraid to be thought less-of, and afraid to really commit in case they lose what the world offers, and therefore, the love of the Father is not in them. Everyone is bipolar until they commit to Jesus Christ. He’s the only solution.

 

May God open the eyes of His remnant before our service is all wasted like Samson.

 

Pastor Clyde Rudledge

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Posted by on October 7, 2018 in Mind, Pride

 

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Sermon 122 – Obedient Defiance

One young woman in our fellowship was struggling with her emotions because another young woman was more popular. The popular one was new to the fellowship, so from the first woman’s perspective, it wasn’t fair that she had been usurped.

This scenario happens time and time again amongst all groups of people. The point is, how is a Christian to address these feelings?

Separation is Biblical, 2 Thessalonians 3: 6,14

The problem was, the first woman’s jealousy was disturbing the whole fellowship. Something inside her was reacting to the unfairness and everyone could feel it. If you let envy fester it will turn to hatred. It may be hidden by obedience, but it’s really hatred and defiance under the guise of obedience. Therefore, according to Scripture, I instructed this woman to separate herself from the fellowship until she stopped her attitude, and at the same time, I asked her to answer several questions in the hope it would help her see her inappropriate attitude.

Questions

Do you think you’re special? Is she jealous that the other woman has taken her position? Is she having a mood? Is her attitude Holy Spirit or demonic? Is she doing what’s she’s told by me, without any defiance in her heart? She answered ‘yes’ to every question and even agreed that she was being manipulated by a demon.

The response that got my attention was the lie that she was being obedient to my instructions without any defiance. Now, if you are being demonically manipulated, and then to think you are being obedient, actually confirms that you are under the influence of a demon and lying to yourself. It’s a contradiction to know you are under a demon and to think you are obedient without any defiance.

Non-genuine obedience

All the people that I’ve pastored over the years considered themselves to be obedient to my pastoral instructions. Very few however, served the Lord without some expectation of benefit, meaning that their obedience is not true obedience. Obedience that’s not true always carries with it some form of defiance, and sooner or later, that defiance will expose itself in contradicting the authority.

The bottom line

The bottom line in every person’s heart is the belief that they have the right to their own opinion and no one is ultimately going to tell them what to do. This is the heart of Satan, not God. To them, their obedience is the evidence of their willingness to be told what to do, so no one can say that they are not a good person. Their argument is … ‘surely, I have the right to my own opinion and the right to figure it out myself.’ However, from God’s perspective, it’s not one’s right that’s the issue, it’s the bite of defiance that protects that right.

Example

During a discussion with one Christian young man, I suggested that he may have missed my point about him having a grievance with another man because his inappropriate behaviour resembled that of the man. He retorted … I didn’t miss your point. Now, it’s fine to have a difference of opinion. It’s not the difference of opinion that’s the issue; it’s the bite behind the opinion. It doesn’t matter how obedient you think you are to the authority’s instructions, a bite confirms that your heart is not obedient; on the contrary, it’s defiant.

Defiance is inherent. It has to be broken.

Every person on the planet is born defiant. It’s inherent in our spirit because of our link with Satan through our sin. When one truly surrenders to the will of God, a slow up-hill process begins whereby God changes our inherent defiant character into His self-less character. If you’re truly open to the correction of Christ, you will begin to see your inherent stubbornness and begin to sacrifice it to Him. The problem arises when one refuses to see it and ultimately turns their back on the process.

Every person is a King Saul, until they give up and become a David

In 1 Samuel 15 we read the story of the stubbornness of King Saul. From his perspective, he was doing what he was told, but from God’s perspective, he wasn’t. From God’s perspective, his behaviour was witchcraft and idolatry (v.23). That clearly means his heart was under the control of Satan at the same time as he was worshipping God (v.31) and thought he was being obedient (v.20). Whether you like this point or not, the truth is, everybody acts this way and believes this lie, until they unconditionally surrender to the will of God. Everyone is born under the control of Satan, no matter how obedient they may appear, and this control deepens until they sacrifice their pride to the will of God.

What was missing in King Saul’s obedience?

King Saul had let his humility turn to pride of position. He loved being No.1. From his pride’s perspective, he was doing what he was told, his way. When you’re ready to blame others for your misdeeds, you clearly show you’re being deceptive about your obedience. When your prime concern is what others think of you (v.30), you clearly show that your obedience is a camouflage for your defiance. What you don’t realise is that you are reinforcing Satan’s grip on your spirit. You can act obedient as much as you like, but if the Spirit of God is missing, you’re lying to yourself and others, and you’re under the power of a demon. In 2 Timothy 2: 25,26 God describes this as “opposing yourself” and under the snare of the devil and controlled at the devil’s will.

Which camp?

Now, if Samuel is standing with God and Saul conflicts with his opinion of what’s right and wrong, then clearly Saul is not standing with God. You’re either in God’s camp or you’re in the camp of Satan, and any middle ground is the same as not standing with God. If, by the Spirit of God, you declare that a person is not being obedient, but they contradict and demand they are, then immediately they have exposed their defiance and exposed what spirit they are really of. Defiance is simply contradicting the Spirit of God. Arguing the point against God’s representative, is defiance, and thus, demonic.

The bottom line

What was the underlying problem that stirred Saul to defy Samuel’s opinion? The answer is, he fed his heart with the pride of his position and defended that position when challenged he was wrong. Later on, he reinforced that pride by envying David’s threat to that position. Once he decided to solidify this defence of his pride, he was on his way to hell. There was nothing more Samuel could do to save him from his pride. Once you harden your heart and turn your back at the intersection of the challenge of your pride, it’s virtually impossible to find your way to God.

The real issue is Holy Spirit vs Satan

Beneath all the appearance of goodness, there’s a spiritual war going on (Ephesians 6). You either stand on God’s side or Satan’s. Pretending with niceness or obedience in middle ground is the same as neither hot nor cold, and therefore satanic. Obedience with defiance is actually hatred and demonic. It’s not God’s responsibility to fix this problem, it’s yours. If you refuse to address your pride when it’s exposed and humble yourself to the mind of Christ, don’t blame God when you miss heaven.

May God stir the hearts of his remnant to oppose their pride, not themselves, so that Satan is bound, not them.

 

Pastor Jonathan Wright

 
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Posted by on April 14, 2018 in defiance

 

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Sermon 86 – The LIE of “HAPPY”

In western society everybody lives for the pursuit of happiness; men crave no hassles and women crave fashion and friends. Even the Declaration of Independence states that every person has the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Underneath all our goals and ambitions is the desire to feel happy. We do everything for this feeling and we do everything to avoid the bad feelings; no one wants to feel sad, worthless, or inferior. We all want to feel happy and we believe it’s our right.

Is this God’s perspective or man’s?

Humans try to find happiness through a spouse and kids, through sport, occupation, education, skills, friends, retail therapy, tv, money, travel, cars, hobbies, sex, through achieving some sort of importance etc. and if they can’t find enough of it they turn to drugs, food, alcohol, pets and sexual perversion to dull the pain, or simply somehow block their feelings so they feel no hurt pain.

There’s a popular song that says that ‘happiness is the truth’. It declares that happiness is the solution to all of life’s problems, and it’s popular because it’s inclusive for everyone; no one should be exempt from being happy … everybody’s into the drug of happiness.

I deserve to be happy because my parents and siblings made me feel unhappy

I was counselling a woman who shared that because her childhood was so unhappy, she had set her goal to be happy as an adult. No one was going to ever stop her having happiness. Nothing was ever going to make her unhappy again. She was going to act happy, be happy and expect happiness from family, people and God, and if they didn’t give it to her then she had the right to put them in their place. Anybody that made her unhappy was wrong, bad and her enemy; and anybody that made her happy was good and her friend. She fantasized that she was a princess and everything was diagnosed on the basis of what made her happy, and she learnt to block out those emotions that made her feel unhappy so she had no pain.

She hated Samuel’s mother, Hannah, because she was more loved than Peninnah, even though Hannah was barren, and she set her heart to be a Ruth because despite her pain in life, she got the love of Boaz. This is a very selfish wounded spirit, yet believes she’s a Christian.

She believed that if God was her father as he declared, then He was responsible to make her feel happy, so, of course He would give her whatever she wanted and needed. I’ve seen this person in the church many times over.

The problem was, her whole goal was selfish; it had nothing to do with the will of God, and it had nothing to do with the love of God; it was all about the love of ME. It was all built on her wounded pride and her grief at not getting what she believed she deserved. On the outside she looked very together, but on the inside, whenever she saw people that appeared happy she would despise them and even set her course to destroy their happiness because she didn’t have it.

In James 3:14-16, the Word of God describes this kind of behaviour as demonic, because it’s lying, bitter, envious, earthly, sensual and devilish.

Happiness seems like it’s of God, and the word ‘happy’ is used throughout the scriptures, but it’s an English word that’s been incorrectly placed in our modern versions.

The origin of ‘happy’

‘Happy’ comes from the Old English word ‘hap’ which means someone who’s had good luck. The world’s promoted the feeling that if you’re lucky, you’ll be happy, and that’s what we’re all chasing. We all want to get the good luck and the feeling.

In the Bible however, both the Hebrew word ‘esher’ and the Geek words ‘makarizo’ and ‘makarios’ have been interpreted as ‘happy’, incorrectly. The truth is, you won’t find the word ‘happy’ in the bible. The real meaning of these words is ‘blessed’.

‘Blessed’

‘Blessed’ isn’t what you’ve been trained to think it is. We all think it’s getting something from God and getting the good deal. However, In the scriptures this word ‘blessed’ actually means ‘indwelt by God and thus fully satisfied’ [ref. #3106, #3107 Lexical aides in the Hebrew-Greek Key Word Study Bible, KJV]. This word relates only to those who are saved vessels. In other words, it’s only genuine Christians that can ever find true happiness; though the world will try and trick you otherwise. A genuine Christian never chases happiness nor seeks the feelings of happy. They are indwelt by God and that’s all that counts. Thus, it doesn’t affect their inner core mood if they have things work out or not. They don’t base life on what they have or have not got. They don’t envy their neighbour because of what he has and they don’t laugh at their neighbour because of what he doesn’t have. Their outward emotions are based on the inner confidence that the Spirit of God dwells within.

Happy is a state of the heart, not a state of the emotions

The beatitudes in Matthew 5 clearly spell out that inner ‘happy’ only flows from being poor, being sad, being meek, being merciful, being pure, being a peace-maker and being persecuted for righteousness. In fact, in verse 12, the greatest level of happiness and the highest level of reward are found through persecution, not through fun and frivolity.

In John 13:17, happiness is the fruit of being a servant and washing people’s dirty feet. In Proverbs 29:18 … ‘happy is he that keeps the ten commandments of God.’ In Psalm 128:1,2 … happiness is the fruit of fearing the Lord. These happinesses are all because one is saved by grace through faith, not because it’s one’s right or motive, and not because one keeps the ten commandments or washes people’s feet. It’s not the act that makes you happy; it’s what’s in you that stirs you to the act.

Is it wrong to be happy?

Of course not, but if that is what you’re chasing them it’s of Satan and you’ve been conned. Genuine happiness can only come as the consequence of a relationship with the Spirit of God; every other means is fake and deception.

Of course God designed everyone to be happy, but Satan stole that right from us, and although the churches teach you that happiness is part of the package you deserve when you become a Christian, the right to happiness will not flow to you until you’re saved. You need to realise that if you’re chasing happiness as your right, then you haven’t found God, and you’re not saved; you’ve just been conned by Satan. Genuine Christians don’t tell God what their rights are; they’re dead to themselves and alive to His will and purpose, and that’s their source of happiness.

A lot of people simply go to church because they’re looking for something to make them happy. We’ve all been told that church is supposed to be happy, but that’s because the church is not the church. You’ll only find the real church when it’s suffering the flames of persecution, and in western society, the church is going all out to make sure it adapts to the world’s wishes and attitudes so it never suffers persecution. Therefore, its projected aura of happiness is a sales pitch for more numbers and money; it’s not God.

Happiness built on sand

You either have happiness built on sand where you live for yourself to be happy and serve God with the expectation of Him giving it to you, or you have happiness built on the rock where your happiness is simply in the privilege of serving Him without any expectation of reward or benefit.

Control

Eventually, people chasing ‘happy’ will expose what spirit they’re really of by controlling you for their own happiness. If you want to be happy the world’s way, you will have to control your environment to get it. Thus a fake happy will intimidate, blame, lie, be generous or whatever, to retain their position so they keep their feeling of happy.

The woman I was counselling fantasized, in her belief system, that she was a princess and was very special to God and thus had the right and position to tell everyone what to do and to question and challenge anyone who made her feel unhappy; plus, being a princess obviously meant that she should never be a maid or servant because that would degrade her position of importance. Until she comes to her senses and repents she’ll never be able to wash people’s feet (even if she does the act) and thus she’ll never be indwelt by Holy Spirit, and thus she’ll never be satisfied and thus she’ll never find happiness. Like a mirage, it will always escape her.

You have to be dead to yourself to be happy; anything else is self-deception and a lie.

May God touch your spirit to repent so He can indwell your dead spirit and bring it to life.

Pastor Keith Raymond

 
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Posted by on June 13, 2015 in Happy, Lie

 

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Sermon 75 – I DON’T KNOW

I was questioning a young man recently about something I was concerned about and suspected he had done and his response was a flippant “I don’t know.” “I don’t know” is the most common way of avoiding a question we don’t want to answer especially if it could get us into trouble, but it’s the wrong way to get out of danger. The quickest way out of spiritual danger is to Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on September 27, 2014 in Pride

 

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Sermon 71 – EVERYBODY SPEAKS 2 LANGUAGES

I was recently counselling a young man who had said something to a friend that caused that friend to give-up on another personal relationship. He defended himself by arguing that all he had said was that the other relationship was ‘weird’. I pointed out to him that he had said the word with a dagger attached. Although he agreed with me that he was wrong and was being selfish and envious for the friend’s attention in preference to their other friend, he still went home and told his father that the relationship was ‘weird’.

With his mouth he was confessing that he had said the word with the wrong motive, but in his heart he showed his defiance to my authority by holding to his position with the argument that all he had said was that it was ‘weird’. He was speaking two languages. What he really was saying with his spirit was
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Posted by on May 11, 2014 in Voices

 

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Sermon 66 – EXERCISE FOR LIFE

If you don’t exercise you will atrophy. That is, your body will deteriorate and eventually die.

Exercise is stress. As babies we had to learn to stand and walk. If you don’t put yourself under that stress then you will never train the neural pathways from your brain to your muscles which are designed to make your muscles work, and your bones will never be strong enough to support your vertical weight. It’s not automatic, it has to be stressed. It’s a stress to get up and walk. Running is a stress on your body. Like a tree needs the wind to stress it so it can strengthen itself, so moderate exercise is necessary for your body to stay healthy. And exercise needs to be done 3 times per week for 20-30 minutes in order to at least maintain and hopefully improve your level of strength. Yet, if you exercise incorrectly you will hurt your body and even potentially break it, and also teach your nerve pathways the wrong information for your muscles.

The same thing is true for our spirits.
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Posted by on January 17, 2014 in Resist evil

 

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Sermon 64 – I’M GOOD

Q. What is good?

Q. Do you think of yourself as good?

Q. What % of good are you?

Q. What % of good confirms you are a Christian?

Q. What % do you place on your fellowman thinking that you are good?

Q. Why are you trying to be good?

Q. Is good a measurement of salvation?
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Posted by on November 16, 2013 in Elevation, Pride

 

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